When you are newly dating there is a period of perfect grace in the beginning where all the things that will one day annoy your lover, now charm and beguile. And it seems as if the beginning will be the basis for a fantastic, synchronous choreography rivaling anything Busby Berkeley ever pulled off–unless the woman you are dating lives 60 miles away, which has the potential to throw a banana peel into the whole production.

Lucky for me I can’t drive 55, so I throw some Drunken Tiger on the car stereo, put the pedal to the metal, and then make like a hare sprinting to the end of the finish line to see Juliet, the woman I’m dating. But sometimes it’s best to be a tortoise and take it slow–especially when you’re going 75 mph in a 55 zone. (That’s a pricey speeding ticket).

Look, we’re lesbians. We like to progress at rocket speed in relationships, until we’re practically shacked up after the second date. The built-in geographical distance between Juliet and I serves as a firewall of taking things more slowly than your typical lesbian relationship. The result? We spend more time on the phone getting to know each other the old-fashioned way–through the art of conversation.

But when it comes to seeing Juliet in person, wild horses couldn’t drag me away. However, I tell myself: Don’t hesitate, but take it slow, Romeo–because slow and steady wins the race.

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