Many of us love to dance, but not all of us can move like Shakira–despite what we think after three margaritas. I for one have been all limbs—much like a baby giraffe—since birth. My bony elbows don’t make for the best party favors when being thrown side to side into the ribs of innocent bystanders. And yet, I love to dance.
We’re not all classically trained ballerinas either, nor can we throw down some angry twerk moves like this little Beyonce; but we can at least prepare ourselves for that moment when a song comes on that compels our bodies to move.
We’ve all been to that party where the tribal tattoo guy decides he wants to introduce everyone to a little thing I like to call: the worst way to move your body. Please don’t box-out, lean like a cholo and proceed to dump all of our drinks onto our bodies, because that’s zero fun for everyone. Instead, let’s leave some space for breathing and move in a way that doesn’t require trained medics on staff.
In honor of the second 303 Magazine Pool Party this Sunday August 25th, here are some tips for dancing in a way that won’t make bystanders run for the hills or attempt to give you the Heimlich.
Wear Something Danceable
If you’re planning on wearing that itty-bitty bikini that your tatas love to pop out of and wave to strangers, maybe the shimmy sidestep move isn’t right for your outfit. Instead, pick a top that you know will complement your dancing or wear your skimp-suit and sway carefully. If you’re going to wear sky-high stilettos, please don’t try and stomp holes in the ground or channel any dance battle shows–you will break your ankle.
Practice in the Mirror
Which sounds really dorky, but if you’re feeling uber self-conscious about your moves, watch yourself. If you still find you’re knocking over lamps and unintentionally doing the stanky leg every other song, maybe find a nice float and stay poolside.
Don’t Get Hung up on Partners
Most of the time, a guy or girl will just be happy he/she is dancing with a member of the opposite sex, so don’t worry to much about what your hands are doing, where your hips should go, etc. Just go with it. Remember it’s sometimes more fun dancing with a big group of your friends than singling out a random for an awkward rendition of Dirty Dancing.
You’re Not A Pool Noodle
Throw some shoulder action into the mix. Move your hips. Don’t just flail appendages into the universe wildly like a pool noodle. You are not Gumby. Music is all about emotion, listen to the melody and don’t get stuck in the same combination of three moves. Try and make your body parts move in a pattern that makes sense. Head weaves, shoulders sway, hips shake, feet move side to side, hands go up. (“And they stay there, and they stay there”)
Listen to the Music that’s Actually Playing
If you’re listening to hip-hop, the beat is important. Bob your head to match the bass and then move the rest of your body in a likewise manner. If you’re listening to some 80s-inspired electro-pop, you have more freedom for energy and movement. But listen to the music. If you still find yourself in some weird realm off on your own, while everyone seems to be dancing on the same planet, remember you can never go wrong by throwing your hands in the air and waving them like you just don’t care. And maybe a bouncey finger-point or two.
When All Else Fails: Novelty Dance Moves
If you’re a particularly comical human and can reel in a crowd with your sparkling personality, try out some novelty moves. Maybe do the robot to a few EDM songs then transition to Gangnam Style or the Macarena. In this case, you must commit to your dance choices (attitude is key) because not everyone will join in at first; but look like you’re having enough fun and soon the entire pool is doing the Dougie.
So if you want to dance your face off at the pool party this Sunday, grab tickets here and let’s twerk it out.