3 dudes

Photo by Brett Andeck

303 Magazine’s 2nd Pool Party of the season is happening this Sunday, August 25th. If you are going to the event hoping to meet a very special bikini-clad babe or shirtless stud, there are a few things you should be wearing besides the latest beach fashion and sunscreen.  In fact, regardless of the social setting, if you want to turn your sex appeal up a notch and be a chick or guy magnet, keep reading.

The good news is you don’t have to look like a swimsuit model to be hot at a pool party. Real people aren’t airbrushed or photo-shopped and sex appeal comes from within. Sexy is not solely based on looks, it’s an attitude. Here are six tips that will help you make a splash at this Sunday’s 303 Pool Party or any social scene.

What’s Hot and What’s Not

  1. Self-confidence = Hot. Being comfortable in your own skin will make you more attractive.  A self-assured individual is authentic and puts others at ease. Confident people are aware of their assets,but can also accept their shortcomings. Because they have a healthy relationship with themselves, they are more capable of having healthy relationships with others. In both men and women self-confidence equals sex appeal.
    Arrogance = Not. Arrogance is what occurs when one leads with their ego. Arrogant people may be loud and obnoxious, or have an attitude of superiority to compensate for their own insecurity. They are ‘self’ focused rather than self-aware. Not attractive.

    girls at fountain

    Photo by Brett Andeck

  2. The Art of Conversation = Hot. Once you catch the eye of the object of your desire, keep their attention with intelligent conversation.  Good conversationalists are interesting, and interesting equals sexy. Besides, intellectual stimulation is the best kind of foreplay, so fine tune those skills. People like to talk about themselves, so a good conversation starter is to ask someone an open-ended question about themselves. This will usually lead to more questions, and answers, and voila, you have a conversation. Bonus tip: Good listeners are hard to find these days, so that makes you extra hot.
    Speaking like you’re texting = Not. We live in an age where the extent of many people’s daily communication consists of instant messaging, texting, emailing, tweets, and wall posts. Rather than approaching someone with a cheesy pickup line, or speaking in acronyms or two word comments, have something of substance to say and show that you have a genuine interest in them. “You’re hot”, “hey beautiful”, and “wassup?” are examples of poor opening lines. Everyone loves compliments, but expand your vocabulary.
  3. Courage = Hot. Just because you think someone is gorgeous don’t be afraid to approach them. We tend to make assumptions about people based on looks. If a guy sees a ‘hot’ girl he may assume that he doesn’t stand a chance. If every man thought that way, she’d never get asked out on a date. Women like men who know what they want and go for it. Don’t assume that every ‘hot’ guy is in a relationship, or might be an asshole. Don’t prejudge. Besides, men are often impressed when a woman makes the first move.
    Fear = Not. Don’t be a wimp. Let go of the fear. Don’t stand around on the sidelines waiting for someone to make the first move. Get in the game and work your magic. You might be surprised at the results. This advice is as valid for women as it is for men. Take the initiative.

    couple

    Photo by Brett Andeck

  4. Being approachable = Hot. Let your guard down. Be open to meeting new and different kinds of people. No matter what you’re wearing, a smile will be your most attractive accessory. Look like you’re having fun and you’ll attract more fun. Be polite to those who make an effort to meet you. Look people in the eye when speaking with them. Women underestimate how much courage it takes for a man to approach a woman he wants to meet, especially if he thinks she’s the bee’s knees.
    Detached or Rude = Not. If you are not interested in conversing with someone be polite by acknowledging them with a brief exchange then excuse yourself from the conversation. Kind people are sexy. Rude or insensitive people are not. If you are initiating contact and the interest is not reciprocated, don’t let it get the best of you, regardless of how they respond. Never lower yourself to a rude person’s level. Always take the high road.
  5. Respectful and Charming = Hot. Wanting respect is human nature. Although sexual attitudes have become more open in the past 50 years, in reality, women are still looking for gentlemen who will treat them like ladies. And thanks to online porn, and technology hindering our social skills, gentlemen seem to be a dying breed these days. So guys, try not to be mesmerized by the sea of cleavage, and look at her face when you’re talking to her, and respect her personal space. Of course this goes both ways. Ladies, if you want to be treated like a lady, then act like one. Behaving like a lady or a gentleman in public, regardless of the setting, is still sexy. Charm and respect never went out of style, they’re just harder to find these days, making them even more valuable.
    Pushy or Crude = Not. Too much alcohol and a lot less clothing is no excuse for inappropriate behavior. Even if a woman exudes sexuality (especially in a bikini) does not mean she’s fair game for crude remarks. You might be centerfold material or have the physique of Michelangelo’s David, but if you have bad manners, you’ll still look like a jerk.
  6. Sense of Humor = Hot. Humor bridges gaps. If you can have a sense of humor about life, and not take yourself too seriously, people will be more receptive to you. You don’t have to be a stand-up comic to be funny and entertaining, and funny people get laid more. Just ask any stand-up comic.
    Smart Ass = Not. The most successful comedians know how to turn pain into humor and they make people laugh by exposing their own human vulnerabilities, rather than making others the brunt of their jokes. Refrain from sophomoric humor and don’t belittle your friends or people you don’t know for the sake of a laugh. It’s really unattractive.

    funny chicks

    Photo by Brett Andeck

To quote the very sexy and wise Sophia Loren: “Sex appeal is 50% what you got, and 50% what people think you have.” So although you may be wearing little else, put on your self-confidence, have some intelligent conversation in your back pocket, don’t forget your charm and sense of humor and take your sexy self to the 303 Pool Party this Sunday at the Breakers. There’s no telling what could happen. At the very least, it will be a fun way to beat the heat, hang out with some friends, and enjoy the scenery.

303 Magazine Pool Party of 2013 is this Sunday, August 25th at The Breakers from 11am-6pm.

Purchase your tickets HERE.  Cabanas and VIP Tables are still available.

 

 

 

About The Author

Relationship/Sexuality/Dating Coach
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Patti Sommer is a Relationship, Dating, and Sexual Empowerment Coach. She spent the first half of her life in a committed relationship that spanned nearly two decades. After reinventing herself, Patti found life as a single woman to be both exciting and challenging. Using what she learned from her own experience and research, she empowers both men and women through her personal coaching, workshops, radio appearances, and her freelance articles. Patti uses a holistic approach toward relationships and sex, working with clients from the inside out regarding self-image, outward projection and self-healing work. You can contact Patti for more info on her services at [email protected] In her spare time, Patti also performs burlesque and standup comedy.

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