You walk into the gym for the first time. Now what? You see a hot guy lifting weights to your right and a super skinny gal unnecessarily wearing only a sports bra showing off her six pack abs on your left. Do you run right back out in horror and count that as your workout? Do you hop on the first piece of equipment you see and risk looking like an idiot if you can’t figure out how to operate it? Do you choose the wrong workout and leave the gym feeling more exhausted and frustrated than Cee Lo Green trying to pick up loose change off of a wood floor?
Everyone has a specific ”type” when it comes to relationships with individuals. Some just need a little more help in order to find their type, and online dating sites make it easy to pinpoint an individual’s type for a perfect mate. The same thing is true for relationships with workouts, and now finding the perfect workout match can be just as easy. Please take a few minutes to review your new workout matches:
About me: Shanti shanti. I’m a lover, not a fighter. Yin and yang, amiright? I’m an easy going yoga workout that just wants to take it slow and see where things go. There’s no rush and no need to push yourself, just do what you can. I’m versatile and great for beginners, those who are more experienced, or those who like it hot.
Interested in: I’m just looking for someone who goes with the flow but isn’t afraid to get downward dog and dirty. Let me help you relax, re-center and lengthen those limbs. Want to avoid the gym or a public class? Do me in your home, in the park, or on top of a mountain. Either way, grab a mat, find your breath, and channel your inner strength and peace with me.
About me: I won’t waste your time. Once you get to know me I will burn your calories as fast as I can, as long as you’re willing to work at it too. I always go the extra distance all while having a good time. My motto would have to be “time flies when you’re having fun”. I like to keep things interesting by changing it up and going in new directions every once in a while. I’ll be easy on your knees while helping you become easy on the eyes.
Interested in: Someone who likes to get down to business and sweat but doesn’t take themselves too seriously. You definitely have to be able to laugh at yourself, especially when you catch a glimpse of yourself working out with me in the gym mirror. I need someone who doesn’t have a runner’s stamina but wants a cardio work out that’s more amped up than walking. Let’s go for a spin a few times a week, I will give you what you need to stay fit.
About me: Some people think I’m too passive and lack in personality. Well, that may be true, but at least try and get to know me before writing me off. I’m easy to use and a safe bet if you’re unsure of which direction to go in the gym of life. After meeting me you will be either satisfied or unfulfilled, it all depends on how you use me. The rest is up to you (well, mostly your legs, but don’t forget to engage your core, too).
Interested in: I come in different shapes and sizes so I’m looking for someone who is open minded and willing to take the time to get to know me. If you use one of those fancy “real” bicycles often but struggle to keep up the routine in the winter, let me help fill the void. Recumbent me can be a real pushover, but upright me can be a bit of a Type A personality. To sum it all up, I’m really just looking for someone who likes to put the pedal to the metal.
About me: I can be an intense workout and have been told that I make a pretty big impact. I can be easy going but I also love to make a scene. I am all about the physical component of a workout relationship and want you to have a nice body that can keep up with me. I live life on the fast track so be prepared to keep up so you don’t get left behind.
Interested in: Someone who is very active and willing to lace up their running shoes and have a good time by my standards. If you’re high maintenance, you’re not my type. I want someone who makes me a priority and puts everything they have into our relationship. Someone who is driven and doesn’t give up when the going gets tough. Let me take your breath away (literally) and we can bust through that brick wall together.
About me: I’m a pretty laid back exercise that just wants an easy going person to hang out with. Let’s chill if you ever have any free time, you know, just whenever, wherever. I get along with everyone and get put in the workout “friend zone” a lot. Bring a friend or two to our date if you want, the more the merrier. I won’t wear you out unless you want me to.
Interested in: I hold no judgments, in fact, if you have a little “more to love” I’m not opposed. I just want someone who wants to keep moving, but at their own pace. You have to enjoy the outdoors, the little things in life, and stop to smell the roses occasionally.
Bridget is a small town girl working her way through grad school in the big city. She likes to sit down and write jokes and occasionally stand up and tell them. She is a recently converted fitness fan who no longer feels like the awkward, out of place dude in The Black Eyed Peas when she is at the gym. Contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org